Right now, I am about 5 hours away from my family, home, girlfriend, friends, and the valley that I grew up knowing. There is a sign that I pass every other day that says "Salt Lake City 293 miles". Almost everyday there is a good chance that I have a common acquaintance with someone back home. I've actually already met one, and I'm sure I will meet another whom I have grown up around as a child.
Almost every person who is preparing to serve the Lord secretly hopes to go to some unique place as their residence for the next one and a half to two years. For some strange odd reason, there has been an idea of our "value" as an individual contributing to where it is we are going. I know this because I myself have fallen subject to such a mindset of thinking. When I first opened my call( and I mean the actual first time. When I steamed it open and read it by myself) I was severely shocked and a little disappointed. I literally asked myself out loud several times, "what in the world is in New Mexico?" After opening my call and trying to wrap my head around the reality of the destination of my service, I was dismayed with knowing that I would not be in some foreign, exotic, impoverish, deprived, and unique place. I found myself thinking that I did something wrong to get sent here.
Now, after 3 months of waiting for my departure, and 5 months of serving in the field, I have been able to gain a fresh perspective that will shape the rest of my life. Asking myself, "what in the world is in New Mexico?", has brought a very very different image. So, when I ask myself this question, I now start to think of the reservation. I start to think of all the dogs that would try to bite and eat us around every corner. I think of the fry bread and the tortillas that would be served at nearly every meal. I think of the Native American Church and some of it's beliefs. I think of the "traditions of our fathers" and how it has a completely different meaning. I think of the plateaus and half finished mountains. I think of the bumpy roads. I think about the people. About how much I love them and have come to care about them. How I have come to appreciate the individuals and culture that they hold. To have them care about me and give me a promise that I am always welcome into their home. I think about the little miracles that occurred right before our eyes almost every single day.
And yet, even four and a half months into my mission, I still have the negative and poisonous mindset about where I am called to serve when I get transferred to Monticello, Utah. The negativity and poor attitude sinks in and the adversary slithers his way into my thoughts. Frustration and discontent at every corner. Everyone knows where my hometown is. Most of them have driven past the valley I have grown up in my whole life. Some of them know my family members. The wards here remind me of mine own and the people are just as welcoming. Can anybody say "culture shock"? Completely caught off guard by this change of scenery, I am taken away into a series of negative emotions and feelings.
How's the brutal honesty for you? Hopefully I have been able to paint an image of the imperfect individual that I am and the character and attitude that I have chosen to embrace. If this image is sufficiently created in your minds, I will continue to be brutally honest.
Jesus Christ lives. He is the Son of the living God and He lives. He has taken upon himself all of our infirmities, pains, sicknesses, sins, and weaknesses so that we too can triumph. He suffered and died, and was resurrected so that we too may be redeemed from our sufferings. Only in and through the grace and guidance of our Heavenly Father am I able to say that my heart is no longer heavy. This area that I am in is absolutely beautiful. The mountains, the trees, the deer all over the place, the houses, the roads, and the people. Everything around me is an absolute wonder and is just waiting to feel the Lord's love shine down upon it.
Every single day, I am getting fed a delicious and filling dinner. Sometimes we get fed multiple times a day. If there was any chance for me to gain weight, this is it. In every house we encounter there are people who have received and continue to receive the Gospel into their lives. Male, female, old, young, brown, white, and everything in between. What a glorious and grand occasion it is to see so many people being blessed by the Gospel. What adds to this excitement is the people around who don't have it! There are people everywhere who need what we have. We who already have it, need more of it. Despite the fact that Utah is known for being the Mormon state, there are still people who need to hear the good word of the Lord. Wither you are on this side of the world or the next, our Heavenly Father values every single son and daughter of His. His view and His love is unconditional as to those who stand in need. Through diligent efforts, I too can see and feel this for myself.
The biggest thing that I am taking away from being here, is the fact that when I get home, I am going to have just as much of a responsibility to teach the Gospel as I do now. Doesn't matter if I am in a branch of 30 people or a ward of 400 people. There is a work to be done and every single one of us has a job to do, and I now know mine.
Sorry this has been so long, but I hope each of you can see a couple things. First, the Lord can change the hardest of hearts and minds if we look to him. Second, our responsibility for those of us who are members, have a charge and duty to continue to find, teach, and invite. Lastly, I absolutely love my mission. I love the people I have come into contact with. I love the challenges and struggles, and most of all, I absolutely love that I have been given such a great cause to go forth and work, even the cause of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
Love you all!
Elder Brayden James Sandberg
P.O. Box 2
Monticello, Utah 84535
